It seems to me that I’m hearing an awful lot about boundary busters here lately. A boundary is a dividing line, the proverbial line in the sand, sometimes unspoken and invisible, but nevertheless firm and real. Boundaries are necessary. Boundaries in relationships are absolutely essential. I think boundaries are a sign of respect, respect for other people and respect for ourselves.
As life progresses and situations change, boundaries must be adjusted accordingly. If you refuse to adhere to boundaries, trouble is bound to follow swiftly behind.
Some boundaries are so firm that they are laws of the land. No matter how much you admire it and want it, it is not okay to steal what belongs to another person, for instance.
Some boundaries are of a spiritual nature and they are spiritual laws (found in the Bible). No matter how wronged you have been and are offended, it is not okay to walk in unforgiveness, for instance.
Some boundaries are expected to be respected at places of employment, dress codes, professional conduct and punctuality for instance. You want to keep the job, be considered for promotions and earn raises then you must abide by the boundaries.
The boundary busting I have been witnessing lately are relationship boundaries. So, here is what I want to clarify and I don’t intend to be gentle about it.
1- If you are married, you are no longer single. Seems obvious? Well, not to some people. They want to be married but act single.
2- If you are a parent, you are responsible for taking care of your children. Surely people know that? Well, not some people. They don’t have time to be bothered with the welfare of their children.
3- If you are a Christian, you are accountable to God for your actions, your words and your attitudes (heart condition). Surely that’s a given? Well, not for many people. They are constantly justifying what they know is wrong, determined to make it right.
Look, y’all, these are things that should not need saying. These are things that should be clearly understood. But you know what? We’ve got a whole bunch of folks with broken thinking.
In a day and age where everyone wants to live with no limits and no one wants to be held accountable for the actions they take, we are spiraling downward into a state of chaos. Chaos can be a bit exhilarating at first. But in the end, it is a very lonely place to be.
You see, boundaries don’t only prevent you from mistreating others, they prevent others from mistreating you. Boundaries hold us responsible and they protect us from unfair expectations.Boundaries are good for those we love and good for us too.